Saturday, December 20, 2008

say anything

Ian was almost asleep. He could hardly keep his eyes open, but then he'd hear Maxie's nasal passage roar. It left him uneasy. This was the worst idea yet and he had to wonder if Sasha thought he was gay now. Why in the world would he tell her about sleeping with Maxie.

He yawned then, thinking any moment he could be in a deep dream. His chest then heaved remembering Sasha's hand on his. He knew it didn't mean a thing, but he wanted it too. Ian knew she wasn't Lauren. It was very clear to him now, but what would Lauren thin, this kept him from falling asleep.

Lauren had Laleh. They were inseparable. He knew it now. He never had Lauren. Not really. Her mind had either been occupied with Newt or Laleh. Never him. What if he could never occupy anyone's mind? It made him chest tighten and he thought he was about to cry.

Would Sasha even say his name if she had too. He hoped she remembered him, but he was sure she'd find her Rhys and all would be happy in the world. It made his heart hurt so. Did Cecil feel this too? He was certain he wasn't calloused as his sister Kelsy. It was driving him crazy thinking of his friend's ex.

He just wanted some peace and quiet. But the bed was warm. And it was a cold winter night. He closed his eyes and tried not to think of Sasha, but she was there in his thoughts. He couldn't push her away when he so wanted to know how her lips felts. Just how did she feel about him? Did she feel anything at all?

4 comments:

ellie said...

I feel sad for Ian.

dk:dc said...

got to keep warm. oh Ian.

another.ellie said...

Ian you have to find Sasha. Save Sasha.

autumn said...

I feel sad and bad for Ian, too. dunno why. =[